'Lil Slugger

Dunno how many "Paranoia Agent" fans we have out there, but for those of you who are, you'll get the reference... So most mornings while walking from my parking deck off Sunset to the shop, I pass this kid (I say kid, but he's prolly in his early 20s) who is always on rollerblades. I guess he skates to work or something. He's kinda cute and he always smiles at me, but yesterday he kinda freaked me out. He was dressed just like the kid in "Paranoia Agent." Right down to the shorts and red baseball cap and gold rollerblades. It was creepy. I won't be able to look at this guy the same way ever again. Or maybe he's a figment of my imagination that has taken corporeal form and I've conjured him up to help me repress something. Can't say that's a comforting thought. Oh well. If the city of LA is suddenly consumed by an oily black ooze at least you'll all know why. (Watch the show. It's fucked up, but it's good and this will all make soooo much more sense to you :) Today was sorta a weird day. I woke up really, really missing TNI. I can't believe he's already been gone for 3 weeks and is not gonna be around for 5 more. That seems like forever... I got my laundry done, but aside from that, nothing really went as planned. S-boy and I were going to do lunch and then go see the new Harry Potter movie. We only got the lunch thing done though because we had this really, really boneheaded argument. He went home and I was going to go to the movie alone, but ended up missing my showtime and the next show was sold out. Grrr. Arg. So I came home and was going to play some EQ to vent my frustration. Everything started out just peachy. I got into a good group and we laid waste to Runnyeye. I played for about 2 hours and then suddenly the server kicked me off. Ok fine. It happens. So I logged back in, picked up my group, and was promptly kicked off again. It happened 3 times and I was pissed and my group was annoyed so I finally quit trying. Turns out the reason I couldn't keep a connection was because S-boy kept trying to call me to apologize. Great. I'm glad he apologized (ok, so it wasn't really an apology per se, but he did want to say he was sorry he upset me, even though he hadn't changed his mind in regards to what we had argued about), but we got things worked out... and it fucked up my EQ karma for the day. When I logged back in later I couldn't find a decent group and was not in the mood to fight solo so I called it a night. On the bright side, at least "Samurai Champloo" is on now. I'm going to watch that and then go read the last 50 pages of "Wolves of the Calla." Tomorrow I'm doing brunch with S-boy and then going to see Harry Potter. I want to see "Walk the Line" too, but don't know that I'll be in a double feature kinda mood. Guess we'll see how the day goes. At least next week will be short. I love Thanksgiving. I look forward to my trip to Missouri all year. I'm more psyched about Thanksgiving than I am about Christmas. I really kinda wish I was staying here in LA for Christmas rather than going back to Atlanta. Is that wrong? It's not that I don't want to see the fam, and I'm sure we'll all have a great time, I just am not that excited about the trip for some reason. Oh well. That's a blog for another day (and prolly a therapy session waiting to happen). I dunno what I'd do if I stayed here anyway. S-boy and TNI will both be outta town and I'm sure HWMNBN will be going home too. Not that that should matter since I'm not supposed to be fraternizing with him these days. Dammit. I really miss him sometimes. Which is stupid. I should prolly hate him. I know this. I just can't bring myself to do it. Is this fucked up loyalty to some of the people in my life a good trait or my fatal flaw? I guess it's like the Tootsie-Pop question, and the world may never know... Well, enough ruminating for one evening I guess... My happy thing for today is my dog. Roland is so cute when he dreams. He runs in place and even barks sometimes. It makes me smile. I hope he catches whatever it is he's chasing...

"I think that all of us are born with a hole in out hearts, and we go around looking for the person who can fill it." -- Stephen King -- "The Dark Tower V: Wolves of the Calla"