Monday, March 14, 2005

Everybody Was Kung-Fu Fighting

I love cheesy martial arts movies. There. I’ve admitted it. I’m not talking about films like “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” and “Hero.” Those are great movies that happen to have martial arts aspects to them. No, I’m talking old Bruce Lee, Jackie and Charlie Chan stuff. Films that came out of Hong Kong in the 70s. Stuff that inspired Tarantino to make "Kill Bill." They can be funny or violent or both. Movies with no real plots, just great fight sequences. There’s a film called “Kung Fu Hustle” coming out next month that’s going to be really fucking funny. I’m willing to bet I’ll go see it. So anyway, last night I went and saw “Ong-Bak.” I had heard good things about this movie and I have to say I was not disappointed. The basic plot is that a small Thai village has the head of their Buddha statue stolen. This kid named Ting volunteers to go to Bangkok to get it back. Much fighting ensues. The actor who plays Ting is a hell of a fighter, which is a good thing because he certainly can’t act. There’s something about him that reminds me of Tom Welling from “Smallville.” This guy is Tom’s long, lost Thai cousin or something. Don’t go into this film expecting anything other than awesome fights and great chase scenes. The story is thin at best. Still, it’s a funny movie and for action junkies it more than comes through. If you’re into “Chop Suey,” kung-fu kinda movies, then I’m sure you’ll like this one.

"When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, looks you crooked in the eye and asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like that: "Have ya paid your dues, Jack?" "Yessir, the check is in the mail." -- Kurt Russell - "Big Trouble in Little China"

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