That Other Irish Holiday

I know everyone is expecting a big rant from me on Valentine's Day. Well guess what? I'm going to post it today instead. Impulsive? Unexpected? Yep, that's me :) I'm posting it early to sorta prove a point about how I don't like being told what to do when... Anyway, let me start out by saying that Valentine's Day is a stupid fucking holiday. I'm not saying this because I'm single. I have always hated this holiday. The last time I was dating someone when Feb 14th rolled around, I told him not to get me anything. (And I didn't say it in a coy way, with a little sexy wink, that implied I wasn't serious.) He then couldn't understand why I was annoyed when he got me roses... The only thing I want on Valentine's Day are those chalky, little candy hearts, and I want them with suggestive sayings and not the cheesy ones they usually have. (You know, "Blow Me" or "Fuck Me" instead of "Be Mine" or something like that.) Guys, take your girlfriend out to dinner on like March 8th or something because you want to take her out, not because some greeting card company tells you you have to... Give her flowers on a Thursday just because it's a Thursday... and for heaven's sake if you want to get her flowers, know what kind of flowers she likes. I'm sure there are plenty of other women out there like me who are not red roses kinda girls... Chocolate is a nice surprise 365 days a year. Why would you only give it to someone on Valentine's Day? People need to show their appreciation to the ones they love at varied, random intervals. Not just one set aside day a year. That's just stupid... I know there are people out there screaming at me to stop before I do any more damage. People who want their lovers to feel obligated to shower them with flowers, and candy, and jewelry for this one day a year. If that's what you want, that's your perogative. I still think it's stupid. I say celebrate St Val's day in true Irish fashion instead. Go somewhere like Fado, drink some Guinness or some good Irish coffee, and then if you've got a significant other, go home and fuck them till they can't walk. If you're single, just keep drinking until you pass out. Fuck that the 14th falls on a Monday this year. Take Tuesday the 15th off and stay in bed having more sex, or sleeping off a killer hangover, or both. Now that's the way to thumb your nose at those tyrannical greeting card people ;)

"Cupid is a knavish lad, Thus to make poor females mad." - William Shakespeare - "A Midsummer Night's Dream"