Dragonslayer

It happens every year. October the 17th. The most extraordinary thing about it seems to be that it was Rita Hayworth's birthday. Just an ordinary day for most. For me, it is anything but ordinary. For me, it is iconic. On Oct 17th, 1995 a piece of me died. It was the day I lost one of my best friends; my soul mate. I still think about Colin every day and I miss him so much sometimes that it physically hurts. I know it is cliche' to talk about having a hole in your heart when you lose someone close to you, but that is really the best way to describe it. People who have never experienced it don't understand, and won't until it happens to them. Lots of people told me that things will get better with time, but it really hasn't. It has been 9 years and the pain has still not gone away. I have accepted the fact that at this point it probably never will. This is partially my fault. I tend to hold onto the past, even when I probably shouldn't, but in all honesty I'm not sure that I want to give this up. Colin was in my life for only a brief period of time, but he changed my life forever. So while the rest of the world marks this day as wholly unremarkable, I choose for it to remain significant to me.

"You changed my life. You changed my life, and I've known you four days. This is the start of something really big, but right now, I gotta go." -- Zach Braff - "Garden State"

Pax in morta. You were always my dragonslayer. I miss you.